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I Am a Non-Confrontational Missionary

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Few people in the world have ever seen my angry except for family and other Missionaries because I am a fairly laid back and relaxed person.  Certain individuals however have the power to turn me from calm and peaceful Bruce Banner into a furious incredible hulk (lets give teenagers a minute to go Google the words Bruce Banner before continuing shall we).

Don’t get me wrong I can put up with a lot of things, but opinionated people annoy me.  Now please don’t think I’m saying it’s wrong for someone to have an opinion about subjects, obviously we should all be willing to stand up for our beliefs or ask for something we think is important.  But we all have those friends who take it upon themselves to share their opinion on every single subject and of course have to be right every time.  You know the people I’m talking about; the ones whose response to the question “what movie should we watch” is defended as if their very lives depended on it.

Part of my annoyance with these people comes from the fact that God made me non-confrontational, which means I rarely share my opinion about things strongly.  Non-confrontational people are known to ask others for help, but only if their right arm has been severed from my body, and someone is beating them with it.  My parents used to end every Skype conversation with the words “do you need anything” but stopped doing so because my answer was always no (even if I did need something).  Being non-confrontational isn’t so much about low self-esteem but deals with having a passive personality (focuses on others who have much greater needs than mine) and the fact that there are enough people in the world demanding their rights or trying to win arguments.

Many people upon meeting me are surprised because I don’t fit their preconceived notion of what a missionary should be like.  We have the idea that Missionaries should be a mixture of Jack Bauer, Macgyver  (just Google it kids), and Indiana Jones.  They must be courageous people who never show fear or weakness of any kind no matter what the danger.  They can fix any problem without the help of others in less than twenty-four hour, have a growing ministry with people getting saved every week, and write tear jerking stories in their weekly prayer letters.  In short, Missionaries are courageous, successful extroverts.

This is why when God called me to become a Missionary during my junior year of High School I laughed instead of accepting the call.  My personality and non-confrontational nature didn’t fit the “swashbuckling and swinging from tree vines” view of missions.  Thankfully the Lord helped me realize there are missionaries of every kind serving Him in foreign fields, and many of them aren’t outgoing extroverts.

Over the last six years I have seen the Lord use my passive personality to open many doors of ministry and provide countless opportunities to share the Gospel with the unsaved of Melbourne.  The Australian culture is one that’s focused on relationships and earning respect with your character, which fits perfectly with a nature that cares deeply about the needs of others.  Sure there are times when the Gospel must confront the sinful nature of individuals hearts, but even this can be done in a spirit of Love so that the Holy Spirit brings conviction.

There are many people in the world like me who when God calls them to be a missionary refuses because they don’t fit the idea of what missionaries should be.  The good news is there is definitely a need for the strong extroverted missionary, but there is also a need for missionaries with a non-confrontational lifestyle.  Yes there is such a thing as a non-confrontational missionary, because the Gospel does all the confrontation and conviction on it’s own, and doesn’t need our help.

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How the Gospel Raised $9,000

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There were many things I looked forward to enjoying while preparing for furlough last September, but raising funds to pay for lawyer’s fees definitely wasn’t one of them.  One of the challenges with applying for a Permanent Residency Visa in Melbourne is at this point you must go through a lawyer which means spending lots of money, in my case it will be somewhere between $9,000 and $10,000.

I knew that this could be accomplished (amazing how much money you can save living in your parents basement) but the idea of spending that much money on something like a visa, which until 2006 cost less than $500 can be very frustrating.

That frustration turned into a form of panic after arriving in the States since most Churches had already filled their yearly schedule, and the ones who hadn’t weren’t able to support new missionaries.  This was a problem because setting aside new support each month would easily result in a few thousand dollars.  The current economic crisis affected me in a deeper way however, since people could no longer give as much in love offerings or gifts to missionaries who spoke at Churches either.

This led me to go through a phase of ministry where my financial need (needing new support and funds to pay for lawyers fees) took center stage but the money just didn’t seem to come in.  So in January with $850 of support left to raise I decided to simply share what the Gospel had done in Melbourne.  Financial needs were still talked about of course, but at the end of the service, and very quickly.  This allowed the Holy Spirit to lead those who the Lord wanted to give.

Since that time the Gospel and the burden of God upon my heart for Melbourne has raised more than $500 of new financial support in four months.  It amazes me that the Lord would provide this kind of financial support, but what’s truly shocking is it didn’t come from an emotional plea or cutting edge ministry presentation, just stories of lives the Gospel touched in Australia.

While the new support fills my heart with joy, it’s the one-time gifts that absolutely blow my mind.  In March I attended a supporting Churches Missions Conference speaking twice (once for fifteen minutes, the other for twenty).  In all honesty this was close to the end of my families huge kitchen remodeling job and I didn’t do a very good job of speaking…the jokes fell flat, there was little energy, and stories that were usually clear and concise turned into rambling.  This is okay because sometimes presentations don’t go as well as they should, you just learn from them.  While walking to the car I pulled the check they gave me out of my coat pocket and peeked inside the envelope…it was for $1,500.00

Now first let me clarify that every penny of this money is sent Baptist Mid Missions so the Church can have a tax-deductible receipt and I don’t touch any of it (all goes towards lawyers fees).  The important thing is people didn’t give more than $1,000 towards my ministry because of a tear jerking story, funny joke, or moving ministry presentation.  They gave because God led them to.

This is the way God works many times, waiting till we stop trying to fix the problem ourselves, then stepping in and taking care of everything in a way that only He can.  There has never been, or ever will be a challenge in our lives that the Lord cannot provide for if we simply let Him take control.

Earlier this year after speaking at a Church I went out to eat with the Pastor and his family.  We had a great time of fellowship over wonderful food and before leaving he handed me a check folded up saying apologetically “sorry I can never get them to round up”…it was for $1,962.  Please don’t think I’m rich folks, every cent of that was also sent to the mission, and as proof I am not rich, here is a picture the knock of brand of Golden Grahams from Wal-Mart I ate for breakfast this morning.

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I came to the States never believing in my wildest dreams God would provide $9,000 to cover my Permanent Residency fees, but a quick check this morning revealed there was MORE THAN ENOUGH to cover all of them now, with probably seven months left to set aside funds.  God does challenge us to take radical steps of faith in our lives, but we can be thankful the victory comes from Him instead of our own strength.

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Going From Excitement to Depression in twenty minutes

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Last Monday was one of the most exciting days of my life, while at the same time one of the most frustrating, and exhausting as well.  In early April I contacted an Immigration Lawyer in Melbourne Australia about the possibility of my applying for a Permanent Residency Visa, and she promised to look into my options.  After waiting more than two weeks I was starting to think she had forgotten about me; but one morning woke up to find an email from her.

The email offered two options, neither of which gave the possibility of applying for Permanent Residency at this time.  This news came as a great discouragement since gaining a PR Visa was my main goal for furlough, and something fellow Missionaries in Australia encouraged me not to return without.  Slowly the initial feelings of disappointment and frustration faded as it became clear that Permanent Residency wasn’t part of God’s plan.

After sending an email to her asking why the PR application wasn’t possible, I forwarded emails to coworkers so they were kept in the loop, and asked the Lord for strength.  Eventually one of the other options she shared started looking better and better; it was a four-year Visa that allowed me following the second year to apply for Permanent Residency.  In the long run this would make the application process easier since communicating and organizing paperwork while in the States definitely makes things harder.

There was another part of the four year Visa that encouraged me…I would be able to go back sooner.  Gaining this would be easier than a PR so there was a distinct possibility of returning to Australia in early fall!  While being home with family and friends is indeed a blessing, part of me will always be in Melbourne and my heart will long to return.  So following some emotional highs and lows I had come to terms with applying for the four year Visa.

Then the second email came……..

At about 8:30 the lawyer responded to my question by saying it was indeed possible for me to apply for a Permanent Residency Visa at this time.  Suddenly the happiness that had been built over the day was doused by cold water (since there would be no easy road to returning) but after reading the email for a second time a flame of excitement began to grow again.

The lawyer said there were two ways to gain Permanent Residency.  The first involved getting something called a Skills Assessment from the Australian Government, which involved paying lots of lawyer’s fees, communication, and paperwork. The second was to gain an organization that could become my “sponsor”, this meant if I went completely bankrupt the sponsor would pay my bills.  This encouraged me since the Church were I serve as Associate Pastor is already a sponsor, and have actually sponsored my last two Religious Workers Visas so getting a PR would become easy.  After about twenty minutes of anxiety I was back to being excited.

Until the third email came……

In it she explained that BOTH items (Skills Assessment and Sponsorship) must be obtained before applying for Permanent Residency.  After forwarding another email to coworkers (the fourth that day) while apologizing for sending so many, and talking with a missionary on Skype I collapsed in the bed exhausted.  Staring up to the ceiling a question popped into my head, “how am I supposed to survive seven months of this emotional roller coaster?”

The good news is I don’t have to ride it on my own.  There are Missionaries in Australia who have gone through the process themselves, a new Missionary couple who gained PR Visa’s in February and could give insight, parents and loved ones who lend a Godly counsel or listening ear, prayer warriors who remember me before the Lord every day.  When experiences of life take us from dancing in the street happy, to tearful disappointment in less than half an hour it’s easy to think we are alone.  But the truth is many walk that path with us, and desire to help along the way

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I Am A Procrastinating Missionary

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAYesterday afternoon I sat across the table from a High School Senior who has been my mentee in a school sponsored mentorship program since November and we discussed his future.  Like many students he is in danger of not graduating without help from Summer School or make up classes, which confused me since he’s an intelligent young man (scoring an average of 95% in his tests and projects).  When I asked him why the grades were so bad he replied, “Oh I don’t do my homework.”

Normally he would do part of his homework during the day at school and then either forget to finish, or just decide not to complete it.  That of course resulted in homework that was only partially completed, and in some cases not turned in at all!  This brilliant student had embraced the “out of sight out of mind” philosophy of schoolwork, and it ended up creating serious problems.

It’s tempting to judge young people like my student for procrastinating on something as important as homework during his Senior year, but the fact is procrastination is a struggle for many of us.  This may not reach the level of forgetting to complete homework you need to pass a class and graduate, but the same philosophy is still at work.

God convicted me about my own procrastination as I left the school yesterday, not procrastinating with homework, but putting off something much more important…my Visa paperwork.

This Monday an Immigration Lawyer in Australia responded to my questions about how to obtain a Permanent Residency Visa.  That email led to three more from me, three responses from her, four forwarded emails to other Missionaries, one Skype conversation with a coworker, and lots of confusion!  By Monday evening I finally had a clear idea about what the first step towards getting a Permanent Visa would be, along with a stomach twisted in knots.

The Australian Government is requiring me to apply for something called a Skills Assessment from an organization in Melbourne that would prove I have the qualifications to be a minister.  This process is expensive ($500), involves tons of paperwork, and will probably require the help of an Immigration Lawyer (which will cost a lot more money).  This and the fact that my nerves were shot after a day of just sending emails created a great temptation to put things off for a little while.

Most of us procrastinate about important things in life, it may not be school work for graduation or visa paperwork, but that doesn’t change the fact that challenges in life lead us (myself included) to take up the same philosophy my student clung to.  In these situations there is a need for close friends or loved ones who will give a loving (and sometimes not so loving) confrontation that forces us to deal with the problem we have been ignoring.

I usually end a mentoring session by asking if there is anything I could do to help the student.  Yesterday he admitted to not following through with a make up class that was supposed to attended last month.  My first thought was to get angry and ask why it took six weeks to bring this up, but after a moment chose  to do something much worse instead.

I personally walked him to the guidance office so he could explain the situation to them.  After getting over the initial shock that he hadn’t started the class yet came a speech that these kind of actions wouldn’t work in the real world (I know the speech by heart it was given to me many times).  As we walked out of the office I turned to him and said, “Well that was painful”; part of me believes the embarrassment of letting them know he had been putting this class off was what led to the procrastination.  Yet the moment of humiliation is nothing compared to what would happen if he never took the class.

There is a need for people willing to give us a gentle push when we get too comfortable putting things off.  For me this is my parents who constantly encourage me to get in touch with the lawyer, countless friends who are praying about the Visa situation, and coworkers in Australia who make sure I know Permanent Residency must be my goal (even if it is expensive)!  In many cases we aren’t exactly grateful for these individuals when they make us face the thing we have been putting  of  (pretty sure my mentee wasn’t happy I forced him to talk with Guidance) but in the long run these experiences are always what help us become better people.

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Why You Earn Respect: A Short Australian History Lesson

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In February of 2004 I visited Melbourne for the first time during a short-term missions trip.  Knowing that jet lag would lead to my falling asleep very early, the Missionary couple I stayed with handed me a stack of children’s books about Australian history with an encouragement to read them in the early morning hours.  More than nine years later the time reading those small books is seen as a vital part of my ministry.

There are a number of differences between the American and Australian cultures, but one of the most important relates to the idea of respect.  Individuals in the States will normally base their opinion about someone on their level or success, authority, or position (those in authority are usually treated with respect).  Australians base their respect on a person’s character, and will often go out of their way to disrespect those in authority.  This isn’t done in a rebellious way; instead it’s uses practical jokes, verbal put downs, or actions meant to test the person’s character.

Many Missionaries (both American and otherwise) upon arriving in Australia think the people hate them because they give us a hard time.  However this is just the Aussies way of explaining, “Respect is earned instead of given” within their culture.

But why do they emphasize challenging those in authority?  The answer lies in the history of Australia, and the relationships they had with those in positions of power.

Of course it wouldn’t be possible to write about everything learned in those books, but it’s interesting to see how some historical events and cultural ideas have helped form their relationship with those in authority.

1.  Australia’s Beginning:  Most people know that Australia began as a prison colony for England.  Running out of space in their prisons, the British decided to send their worst criminals to an island that had recently been discovered.  Not only did this separate prisoners from the general population, but also allowed them to be in a very controlled environment since everyone in the position of power was British.

This lack of freedom was understandable when dealing with criminals who were being punished for their actions; but eventually it was placed upon innocent children born there, and those who traveled to Australia to escape the poverty of other Countries.  As the prisoners slowly died off instead of giving more freedom those in power added to their control over the people, and the prison mentality continued even though the people had done nothing wrong.

2.  Eureka Stockade:  During the Australian gold rush (1854) the animosity between the British and Australians continued to grow.  Gold Miners were charged unfair taxes on the gold they found and many times was given less than the proper value by those in power.  The frustration over this and other issues led a group of miners to kill a British soldier, and then gather in Eureka, part of what is now called Ballarat.

Once there they flew the Eureka flag, one created specifically for the occasion because it didn’t have the British flag in it.  This was viewed as an open declaration of war, and soon English troops attacked Eureka.  Unfortunately the miner’s inexperience in fighting led to their demise because instead of preparing for war, they spent much of the night celebrating their victory, within a few days the British troops had killed every one of them.  There were many other violent revolts against the corrupt government but each ended in failure.

3.  Ned Kelly:  Following the Sheep Shearers Rebellion (1891) Australians were finally given the ability to rule themselves and enjoy newfound freedom.  However there where still some areas where the authority (police, Government) was focused on continuing the old way of doing things.  In these cases Australians would always rise to the challenge and confront the injustice of those in leadership.

One of these individuals was Ned Kelly, a man who after police tried to put him in prison for a crime he didn’t commit, started robbing banks with his brothers.  They were always careful not to hurt anyone (whenever the Ned Kelly gang robbed a bank they would put all the people in the town hall so they could dance and have a party while the bank was being robbed) and would give the money back to those in poor areas instead of keeping it for themselves.  Legend has it that Ned Kelly had created a plan to kill many corrupt police by tearing off the train tracks knowing that they would come to capture him by train.

This plan was averted because one man asked permission to get his “dancing shoes”  but instead stopped the train a few miles ahead.  Ned Kelly was hung, but to this day is loved by the Australian people because he stood up to corrupt leaders.

4.  Tall Poppy Syndrome:  The idea of confronting injustice is still has an important part of the Australian culture, though they no longer rob banks and try to kill police.  Instead most people in positions of power are what Aussies call “tall poppy,” or a person who thinks they are better than everyone else.  There are few things that Australians hate more than someone who is full of pride, so it becomes their responsibility (much like old Ned Kelly) to cut down the tall poppy.  This isn’t done with guns, but words, jokes, or seeing how the person responds to stress.

No Australian would say their emphasis on earning respect instead of getting it because of your position comes from the corrupt British leadership, but they are raised from a young age to question authority.  That sounds terrible yet in my opinion it’s one of the best things about Australia.

We have all been influenced by people who looked or seemed trustworthy, only to learn later they had no real character at all.  Their view of respect forced me to focus on developing relationships with Australians (which is how you truly earn respect) and living a Godly testimony instead of ministry activity during my first year on the field.  Initially this seemed like a waste of time, but the respect I earned because of it has reaped wonderful benefits.